BREAKING: Obama Treasury Official Under Sunpoena From SCOTUS Dies Under ‘Suspicious Circumstances’

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Donald M. Allard, the former Director of the US Treasury, was found dead this morning in a parked car on M Street. His US Marshals detail, four men fully armed and ready for an assault, is missing from the scene. Their commander, Lieutenant Michael Odentray, says a team was dispatched after the detail failed to check in:

“What we have here are four highly-trained men with one simple mission: Get Allard to The SCOTUS building at 9 AM. Either they were taken to tie up loose ends or they were the perpetrators. At this point we just don’t know.”

What the medical examiner does know is that he “doesn’t know what to think.” He says the cause of death seems natural but the scene is just so odd with men missing that it really just doesn’t make sense. A full autopsy will be needed to figure out what killed Mr. Allard.

Allard was being brought to the Supreme Court after being served with the panel’s first ever bench warrant. He was expected to shed light on whether the transfer of billions from the Social Security Trust Fund to the General Fund to be used for “welfare and food stamps” was ordered by the chief executive or if it was “routine financial maintenance” as the Obama administration has previously claimed.

Allard had been avoiding the question for more than 7 months by refusing to accept service on subpoenas from a lower court, which prompted Justice Gorsuch to make the historic move of issuing a bench warrant. “In the end, I’m still a judge and this man needs to appear before my bench,” Gorsuch said in a statement in September.

With Allard dead and no statement on record, Obama will likely get off scot-free…again.

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